Lemme give you a hand with that metaphor, Jonah

See, I'm a nice guy, and I want to help people out when I can, even when they call me a fascist because I like organic food. So when I saw Mustang Bobby taking Goldberg to task for his cliché-ridden screed in the Washington Post, I thought, "why not? He needs the help." But seeing as I don't like him very much, I'm only going to help him in this very limited way.


As pretty much everyone has noticed, the Republican race hasn't exactly followed any of the scripts laid out for it. Mitt Romney has been hacked apart like the Black Knight in "Monty Python and the Holy Grail." John McCain's fortunes - which had been bouncing up and down like a printout of Dick Cheney's EKG - have suddenly spiked northward after his victory in New Hampshire. Fred Thompson ran a brilliant "testing the waters" campaign from his front porch, but when he tried to walk on the water, he sank like a basset hound trying to swim. Pushing the poor beast under the waves was Mike Huckabee, whose down-home folksiness makes Thompson look like David Niven.
Jonah, Jonah, Jonah. If you're going to invoke the Python, you ought to use a more apt example, especially since there's one just begging to be used to describe the current state of the party.
REG:
Right. You're in. Listen. The only people we hate more than the Romans are the fucking Judean People's Front.
P.F.J.:
Yeah...
JUDITH:
Splitters.
P.F.J.:
Splitters...
FRANCIS:
And the Judean Popular People's Front.
P.F.J.:
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Splitters. Splitters...
LORETTA:
And the People's Front of Judea.
P.F.J.:
Yeah. Splitters. Splitters...
REG:
What?
LORETTA:
The People's Front of Judea. Splitters.
REG:
We're the People's Front of Judea!
LORETTA:
Oh. I thought we were the Popular Front.
REG:
People's Front! C-huh.
FRANCIS:
Whatever happened to the Popular Front, Reg?
REG:
He's over there.
P.F.J.:
Splitter!
Obviously, Ron Paul represents the Popular Front. The rest is up to you, Jonah. Run with it.

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