A message for Nick Saban

Get the fuck over yourself.

TUSCALOOSA, Ala. - Alabama’s latest loss has coach Nick Saban searching for ways to motivate his team.

Citing the 9-11 terrorist attacks and Pearl Harbor, Alabama coach Nick Saban said Monday his team must rebound like America did from a “catastrophic event.”

In this case, that would be an embarrassing 21-14 loss Saturday to Louisiana-Monroe.

“Changes in history usually occur after some kind of catastrophic event,” Saban said during the opening remarks of his weekly news conference. “It may be 9-11, which sort of changed the spirit of America relative to catastrophic events. Pearl Harbor kind of got us ready for World War II, or whatever, and that was a catastrophic event.”

An Alabama spokesperson said afterward that of course Coach Saban wasn't trying to equate a lost football game to Pearl Harbor or 9/11 and where on earth would anyone get that impression?

Spare me.

Look, I'm a football fan--not of Alabama, and not of any of the other teams Nick Saban has coached over the years (though I don't dislike the Dolphins)--but it's at times like this where I want to just slap the stupid out of those people who take a game so seriously. It's bad enough that the game is filled with war rhetoric, that some of the plays are named after various kinds of weapons (the bomb, the shotgun formation, etc.), and that far too many of the players and coaches compare the game to a battle, but most of the time, they don't lose their minds like this.

Just so we're clear, Nick--this was a football game that your team lost. It was not a catastrophic event. Nobody died. A country's national security was not compromised, nor were the civil liberties of its citizens suspended or ignored or otherwise trampled on. Your team--a bit of an overrated team at that--lost a game to a team that they should have beaten. That's it.

On a side note, I'd like to point out that while LA-Monroe beat the Alabama Crimson Tide 21-14, they only beat Florida Atlantic 33-30, and that was in overtime. Go team!

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